What does this say about me?

i am a gay male, and have never had any interest in drag. However lately every time i secrete adrenaline i.e. when im angry, running, jamming out, etc. i have an overwhelming desire to dress as a woman. i also have been having dreams lately where i portray myself dressed as a woman, i dont feel i am one i just dress the part. in these dreams i also commit horrible acts of violence. what does it mean?